Day 12: We Are Young Despite the Years

by pjmcbride

Title courtesy of the R.E.M. song “These Days,” which never fails to make me happy. Of course, it came out in 1986, when I was but 31, so…

Our furnace decided to malfunction tonight, so I should type fast to keep warm! (“I could drive you around all night in a heated police car,” Nick offers with elaborate casualness.) (I expected spell-check to tell me “casualness” wasn’t a word, and it did not. It did, however, tell me that “wasn’t” is not a word. Hmm, my spell-check can’t spell, WHERE CAN I GO?)

ADVENTURES OF THE MILDLY-AMUSING SORT: OVERHEARD ON THE BUS

…A woman was saying, “They told me asking for a cigarette on the boat was panhandling.” She scoffed at the very idea, adding, “They sell cigarettes there, but it’s 12 bucks a pack!”

A few observations:

–You admit that cigarettes are indeed available at the casino,

–Yet you don’t want to spend your money on them, preferring to cadge them from others for free,

–So you can spend your money on slot machines.

I would conclude from these facts that asking for a cigarette on the boat is, indeed, panhandling. I would also conclude that, if you’d saved your money instead of flushing it down the toilet that is the casino, you could afford to pay a dentist to do something about your three missing teeth.

As they tell us at work, “It is not your job to criticize others’ lifestyle choices.” No, I do that for free.

Speaking of things I do for free, Nick described me as a “self-appointed writer.” Well, no one else would appoint me!

S.G. POST #12, 3/27/13–Holy Week: Chrism Tuesday

–I discovered a handbill for a Grim Reapers motorcycle gang anniversary party, promising “Fun! Prizes!” I discovered also that the Reapers actually have a website, which advises us, “Do NOT ask how to join.” I think I will become a self-appointed biker, as well.

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