Scratchy Glitter is 1 Year Old!

by pjmcbride

…and what have we learned? Not a whole hell of a lot, I’ll wager. THIS BLOG IS FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. THEORETICALLY.

I re-read last night’s offering–way to still spell correctly while intoxicated! We’ll have to try 3 bottles next time and see how I do. Yes, I’m a cheap drunk. Always have been.

Remember (from so long ago–the post before last, in fact) the Cheap-Glove Fiasco? Bought them, then couldn’t wear them home because they were joined together by the Dreaded Plastic Filament? Rom said, “Did you know you could just pull them apart? I did it with two fingers.” Grrr…

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CALLS THAT MAKE ME WANT TO SAY, “I RECOMMEND YOU EXERCISE MORE DISCERNMENT IN THE SELECTION OF SEX PARTNERS”:

–“My ex-girlfriend wants to take our kid across state lines, and I think joint custody means she can’t do it without my permission.” The caller was 17 years old.

–“I’m here for visitation, but I’m not allowed to approach my ex-husband’s  house until they text me and tell me they’re bringing the children out to me, and they were supposed to do it 15 minutes ago. Oh wait, they’re doing it now.”

–“My husband and I are separating and I want him to leave, but he’s packing too loudly and keeping the kids awake.”

Just remember, kids are our future, and just think how these will turn out.

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