World Leader Pretend: That Time of Year

by pjmcbride

halloween

halloween (Photo credit: BEE FREE – PGrandicelli [the social bee])

Time for what I, as a child, considered the Holy Trinity of Holidays–Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. Time, therefore, to review my rules for holiday decorations:

–Halloween: May be put up no earlier than Oct. 1. I admire creativity in this regard, and I appreciate creepiness in general, so knock yourselves out. Things that actually, if momentarily, scare me, or at least startle me, get extra credit points. Ideally, Halloween decorations should be taken down Nov. 1, but there is a 3-day grace period to allow for All Saints’ and All Souls’ Days.

–Thanksgiving: I allow a lot of latitude here, because most Thanksgiving decorations are indistinguishable from generalized autumnal decor, which may be put up as early as September 1st, and left up until the first day of winter, if you insist. The one exception is actual turkey-themed items, which have to wait until after Halloween. Naturally, they must be taken down after Thanksgiving itself.

–Christmas: There are lots of abuses here, and therefore many rules. They must be put up AFTER THANKSGIVING, and may remain up until January 6 (12 Days of Christmas, remember?). All-white lights are boring, but tolerable. All-blue lights (my favorite color!) are SUPER-COOL, and to be encouraged. The usual multi-colored scheme, however, is perfectly fine. I prefer displays that are not flashingly frenetic, but I understand that I can’t always get what I want. The two most important rules, however, are:

NO inflatables, and

NO snowmen. Inflatable snowmen are, as I believe I stated last year, not even to be thought of.

I knew it was time to re-post these rules, since I saw my first Christmas items today, at Walgreen’s, jammed in with and crowded out by Halloween ones (“Animated Dancing Reaper!” “Animated Flashing Medusa!” I think I’ll go as Animated Flashing Medusa this year, even though Nick said I should be a wicked witch, in a tone which indicated this would reveal some inner truth about me. Although I think turning people to stone with my gaze is equally plausible. Now if only I could grow some snaky hair.).

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