I Did It!
…as Stephen Colbert says when congratulating himself for something he actually did nothing to bring about. I’m now #1 in seniority! Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. I’m as proud as if I actually did it myself. (I guess you could say I did, in a sense–I think it’s called inertia.) I never thought I’d get beyond #4, since the other 3 were all younger than I am. No, I don’t know when I’ll retire, so all you seniority vultures can just stop circling. Yes, it is all about me. (“Isn’t it always?” mutters Nick, but not too loudly.) And Anita, whose promotion actually made this possible–congratulations! Let me be the first to lull you into a false sense of security!